DOAKS

Roll Call mentioned the McCippahs in a Heard of the Hill Column. Flattering!

“Some of HOH’s favorite bits of political swag floating around the Twin Cities are those classy blue suede yarmulkes apparently designed for the discriminating Jewish Republican. The head-coverings are emblazoned with the word “McCippah” (a cippah, or kippah, is another name for a yarmulke) and the phrase “John McCain is Zayer Shain” (translated: John McCain is great). We spotted them on some conventioneers, and one generous convention-goer even offered one to the Rev. Al Sharpton (see above item) at an event he headlined…..”

This is actually true. Someone handed a McCain Kippah to Al Sharpton. And there’s a photo to prove it.

The best part about all this is that amidst the high tension during the Crown Heights Riots, Sharpton was quoted saying: “If the Jews want to get it on, tell them to pin their yarmulkes back and come over to my house”.

It’s 2008 and now Al Sharpton has his very own Kippah!

Side note; I am considering updating the tagline for VanityKippah.com to “If the Jews want to get it on, tell them to pin their yarmulkes back and come over to my house“.

What do you think?

Drudge linked to a story about a guy spending 10K on a Bark Mitzvah for his dog Elvis. You can watch the clip here. Extended footage here. The dog gives a speech and even reads the Arf-Torah, while a fellow congregant dabs a tear.

(For those paying attention, the prayer book page that Elvis has open is NOT the page with the blessings on the Haftorah. Which obviously means that Elvis knows the blessing by heart!)

Please note that this was not my idea. The Bark Mitzvah video ends with the disclaimer: No animals were hurt in the making of this Bark Mitzvah.

While a Bar Mitzvah for a dog may seem like a new trend, it’s not. In 2005, Keith Olbermann featured another couple from Florida that made a Bark Mitzvah for their dog. When asked how they knew their dog was Jewish, the man replied that they figured it out because “the dog loves brisket and Matzah Ball Soup”. Credit to Keith on “Muzzle Tov”.

If you are wondering how to make a Bark Mitzvah, ehow.com has the directions.

Three things I’d like to state on the matter:

1) for my parents, if they read this blog, I repeat: the Bark Mitzvah thing was NOT my idea.

2) I am waiting for the other shoe to drop and non-Jewish dogs start celebrating a faux bark mitzvah.

3) There are some Jewish people worried that this tradition will cause Antisemitism amongst the canine community because other dogs will be jealous that Jewish dogs are rich and have fancy parties.

P.S. There are Dog Kippahs as well.

Good Monday. It’s raining in Seattle. For those who do not live here, that sounds like an obvious statement. It’s not. The summers here are gorgeous. And now, with the weather report out of the way, we can proceed to other titillating news.

Last week, I blogged about the plethora of circumstantial evidence that proves that Michael Phelps does not celebrate Passover. Fine. End of story. A chuckle here. A chuckle there.

But not. The saga continues.

Check this out; on Saturday night, Phelps wins his 8th gold medal. Then, on Sunday, I check my site traffic and notice that visitors are reaching my site by searching “is michael phelps jewish“. More traffic is coming to the site today, again, from the search term “is michael phelps jewish”.

If you search on Google, this Yahoo Answer ranks high. My traffic is coming from MSN and Live Search.

Here’s what cracks me up; why did Phelps need to win his EIGHTH Gold for people to start wondering if he was Jewish? Was 4, 5, 6, 7 gold medals not enough of a feat to be curious about his religion? Why did these search queries only begin AFTER his 8th Gold?

I wonder who is searching for this information. (Google Analytics only identifies what browser the user is on…not his/her religious orientations. Knowing Google, this info will probably be available in the nest year or so.)

Two types of folks are searching for this information, though my money is on the first:

1) Jewish people desperately clinging to the hope that Phelps is indeed Jewish. Why? Because that would be good for the Jews and maybe even bring out peace in the Middle East. In fact, if Phelps was Jewish, there is not doubt that he’d be in the running to be the Messiah. White donkey. White speedo. All the same.

2) The paranoid non-Jew, suspicious of all the Jews in power. Just a little fact-checking to make sure the latest American Hero isn’t Semitic!

Anyways, for the Jewish readers of this blog; yes, Spitz was Jewish and Phelps is not. And Phelps just broke Spitz’s record. BUT, that does NOT make Phelps an anti-Semite.